A broken agreement creates upset, by Nancy Chek
On the court, a broken agreement creates upset. For an agreement that has few immediate or known consequences, I might pretend there’s no upset because my pulse doesn’t race uncontrollably and I have no urge to smack whoever broke the agreement. I might convince myself that, indeed, I am taking it remarkably well, and after all there were probably extenuating circumstances, and so on and so forth. Oh dear no. On the court, a broken agreement creates upset. Period. Even if I have no physical reactions (or murderous ones), there is a small tear in the fabric of the relationship. I promised Nancy I’d call someone today, and I didn’t. I not only didn’t call, I didn’t even notice I didn’t call until she said something. My immediate reaction was that of a child—embarrassed, angry at myself and angry at being caught. Knee-jerk, bloodstream chemical-jerk. How long have I been investigating this? Forty years, give or take? Shouldn’t I be able to manage my reactions more effe